The body parts were experimenting with democracy and the winners of the second round of voting were given a chance to make their stump speech at the election of a ‘new leader’.
The brain spoke first “I should be in charge,” it announced arrogantly, “because I run all the body’s systems. Without my intelligence, you would be nothing.”
“Rubbish!” said the eyes, “Your intelligence is worthless without me to help you navigate the world.”
“I should be in charge,” said the stomach, because I process all your food, give you energy and make you feel happy.”
“Pshaw!” said the legs. “We should be in charge because we carry the whole body wherever it needs to go.”
Suddenly, there was muffled voice from down below. It was the rectum: “I should be in charge,”he squeaked, “because I’m responsible for waste removal.”
All the other body parts burst out laughing at the sheer chutzpah of the insolent balloon knot. Deeply insulted, the rectum pinched his puckering sphincters tight and held on.
Within a few days, the brain was weak, the stomach bloated, the legs wobbly, and the eyes were crossed.
Pretty soon, they all decided grudgingly that the rectum should be the boss.
The moral of the story? Even though the others do all the work…. The ass hole is in control.
Now, I use this joke as a neat illustration of the Grand Old Party of the Republicans in America at the moment, which is in thrall to ‘the rectum’.
The fact that democracy is down to a binary choice in the most powerful country in America is bad enough, but the fact that 2024 is potentially the year of the asshole again, is a danger to the body politic of the world.
I’ve written quite a lot about The Rectum in my blogs, originally in 2018 when he was applying the wrecking ball to democracy in his first (and hopefully last) term. Most recently, he was included in another peroration of mine, ‘Rectal Cancer’.
Since he lost the last election, Donald has been grasping desperately at the levers of power with his tiny, pockmarked, hands and hopes to destroy the whole Constitutional edifice in November with one last swing of the wrecking ball, duly appointing himself ‘king of America’ if it falls.
Presumably, this will necessitate a major brand revision for his party, because in truth, America will then no longer be a republic. (maybe they should be called the Banana Republic(an) party, if he wins?)
I make no apologies for the Biden administration either but I find it remarkable that based on the stats after nearly four years, and on the back of a global pandemic, the American economy is doing surprisingly well and many important laws have been passed. (always one of Donny’s big boasts with no back-up).
Everybody is hurting economically and socially in 2024 but as things go in the global scheme of things, America is in better shape than most.
Politics on both sides of the fence is for sale in America but nominally, one party is still committed to the rule of law and the Constitution which governs the country. That should be a prerequisite for any party’s legitimacy before voters get their chance to cast a ballot. Unfortunately, that can no longer be said of the ‘alternative’.
The Banana Republican party is now a cult of personality, and as the contenders to the crown, Chris Christie, Vivek Ramaswamy, Ron DeSantis, and finally, Nikki Haley yield to the Cheeto-in-Chief, their fate is sealed with his.
Many pundits have remarked that one of Trump’s biggest drivers for getting reelected is to exonerate himself as president from all charges leveled against him, of which there are legion. The second driver is presumably to continue and enlarge on the grift which characterized his first (and hopefully last term). And by deconstructing NATO, he also opens the door to his poison dwarf pen pal in Russia, Putin and of course, the Rocketman. Kim Jong and Chill.
In so many ways, 2024 is a race against time and Justice is the only real weapon left in the toolbox to put Trump and all these other bad actors back in the dysfunctional sequel disaster movies where they rightly belong.
It’s a pretty daring roll of the dice by the Republicans to put all their weight behind a sexual abuser(deemed as liable by a civil case), grifter, and potential traitor banking on the idiocy of a large portion of the American electorate.
If their bid with their boy fails, the party of Abraham Lincoln will be a dead duck and Trump will be consigned to the penitentiary toilet of history where he rightly belongs.
I’m sure I’m not the only one left wondering what hold he has over such a large percentage of the American public given all the facts now available in public about his business dealings, shameless conduct, and low moral.
The Evangelical movement revealed its ultimate hypocrisy to support him in a last ditch attempt to defend white Christian America. At the same time,big business and the mega rich, also demonstrated their cynicism to support someone who offered them the kind of tax breaks that would enrich them further.
But what’s in it for the little people though?
One social pundit suggested that for many, those for example who voted for him fervently in 2016 but have benefited little to nothing from his empty promises are like those victims of the 419 scam, and its multiple variants.
These are the good willing or possibly greedy fools who are played so long by the crook that even when they know they have been scammed they are too ashamed to admit it to themselves or their loved ones. Consequently they allow the tick to continue sucking, until they are sucked dry or, fully bloated, the tick un-attaches from its host.
Then, of course, there are the generally disenfranchised. The large proportion of poorly educated and misinformed Americans who feel that the liberal elites of the East and West coast have disregarded them and are looking for a champion, who himself speaks the language of the aggrieved (victim status, witch hunt yadda yadda).
This cohort of the electorate is easily swayed by conspiracy theories of the deep state and a woke government in league with paedophiles and reptilians (wasn’t that Trump’s old neighbour Epstein?).
Trump’s devoted base are not as Hillary Clinton described them ‘ a basket of deplorables’, they are rather incorrigible basket cases. Nothing he could do or say would discourage them from putting him back in power. These same people will proudly buy the campaign merch, flip a frozen Trump steak into the microwave and brag on about their Trump University diploma.
These are the same people who have paid more than 30 million USD into Trump’s Save America PAC (how about that for the Art of the Deal!).
Trump has also introduced a new level of ugly into politics with his potty mouth, misogyny, bullying, casual racism and incitement to his base to commit acts of violence. This goes down well with them and he knows it, but it erodes democracy in the same way that graffiti encourages crime.
Populists know that violence begins, when bread and circuses end.
In these Trumpian times, it’s easy to paint devils on the wall but there are nine months to go before the elections during which, one hopes, Justice prevails and the Cheeto-in-Chief gets his color-coordinated uniform to wear, not in the White House, but the big house.
I surely hope none of America’s minorities feel are duped into believing he is righteous if he chooses a token brown or black man to be his running mate, or heaven forbid, a woman (sit down Marjorie!) It nearly didn’t end too well for Mike Pence as VP so caveat emptor.
Given Trump’s propensity to withhold classified and secret documents and share sensitive information with unauthorized guests, who knows, he might end up sitting alone in the same Manhattan cell as his old neighbor Epstein.
I hope for his sake, that the cameras aren’t turned off when the lights go out.
Prisons are dangerous places.
